But if I take the drugs I'll have a less holiday themed face

The sore throat that's been dogging me for the last week or so finally resolved into something yesterday morning.  A cold.  Not a horrible cold, apparently.  But with chills, and aches, and snot.  I toughed it out as long as I could, which was about three hours.  I'm not very tough.

I came home and lay down on the sofa, and when I woke up I had several cats on me.  And there was lukewarm pizza in the kitchen.  I had some, then went upstairs to bed.  *conk*

After thirteen cumulative hours of sleep, I was too sore to stay in bed.  I think.  Honestly there's no telling how long I would have slept if the alarm hadn't gone off.

I decided to keep my coughing and my chills to myself, and telecommute.  But first:  doctor's appointment.  It was a bit of a let down.  They had not much clue about ocular rosacea.  I'm not sure why the ophthalmologist sent me to a dermatologist.  Apparently, however, only internal treatment will fix ocular rosacea.  The internal treatment is 40mg of Doxycycline a day, in the form of Oracea.  $547/ month, without insurance.  $10 with.

I am not thrilled with the idea of daily antibiotics for life.  Nor am I convinced that my ocular rosacea is bad enough to require treatment.  I'm giving it a shot for now.  The 40 mg a day dosage is supposed to be anti-inflammatory but not anti-microbial.  I have a return appointment to see the dermatologist in six weeks.  Regardless of what she says, if my eyes don't feel less dry and scratchy by then, no more drugs for me.

Are there holistic ophthalmologists out there?  I'm sure there's some dorky treatment like rosewater eyedrops that a) works, and b) doesn't give you a lifetime of yeast infections and sunburns and resistant bacteria.

The dermatologist also prescribed me a gel and a facial wash for the redness.  I guess I'll give it a try, but I don't really see me as committing to a lifetime of drugging my face.  The redness doesn't bother me, it only bothers other people who see me.  Perhaps I could just get some of those cheap sunglasses to hand out to people who are disturbed by my face.

Anyway, so that was my morning.  A mild cold and a lot of fairly useless prescriptions.

Heh!  I just realized that I forgot to wear red for Valentine's Day, but at least my face was red!

My sweetie got me a Valentine's Day card that was bigger than Oliver.

And for dinner he made me a heart shaped fried egg.  Aw!

I also need a note so I can stay home from work

Dear Internets,

I am tired.  I appear to be coming down with a cold.  I was just going to go watch a John Cusack movie and then go to bed, but then I thought "What if the Internets worry?  "  So I'm telling you that I'm okay.

Okay, goodnight, Internets.  See you tomorrow.

Love,

me

Finalizing some backcountry plans

I've slowly but surely been gathering gear and working out some plans for cold weather backpacking, so I can go year round.  I have a four (ish) season tent, which is my Tarptent Rainbow.  I have snowshoes, though I don't intend to go on snowshoe-worthy trips at first.  I bought my first ever pair of winter hiking boots, although I need to actually hike in them to make sure they will work for me.  I have a 15 degree sleeping bag, and a down quilt to layer inside it.  I have a canister stove, which MIGHT work in cold weather if I keep the canister in my jacket the rest of the time.  I'll have to see on that one.  Alcohol is definitely out, and I don't have a great history with liquid fuel stoves, so I hope the Jetboil will do it.  The Jetboil site suggests yes, but says carry two canisters so you can rotate in a warm one from your jacket.

I'll definitely need to carry one of my larger packs just to fit all the fluffy warm stuff in.

I think my NeoAir will be okay as long as I layer it with a foam pad.  My Big Agnes didn't do AT ALL last year, as my feet hung over the end and they were wretched in the cold air.  Cascade Designs has, of course, come out with a warmer and lighter version of the NeoAir than the NeoAir I have now.  Of course they did.  Dang.

I think I'm good on clothing (my butt is literally covered by my insulated Skhoop skirt), but my feet get cold at night no matter what, so I've ordered some down slippers to wear in the bag.  I think I'm getting pretty close to being ready to take a trial run.  Just a one night trip at first.  I might even redo the same trip I did last February in Maryland, so conditions will be as close to the same as I can get them.  I might even set it up so I get to go to the South Mountain Inn's Sunday brunch, like last year.  That was awesome.

Add some single use handwarmers, a hot water bottle (leak proof, preferably) in my sleeping bag,  and a wee dram of scotch, and I think it sounds like a fabulous night out.

You know what, though?  I think I'll try the whole setup out on my porch.  Just in case.  If my feet start to freeze during the night, I have a giant, hot husband who'll let me warm up my parts on him indoors.

Going to bed, but first: I am irked.

I hab a code.

Actually it hasn't gotten that far.  I have an incipient cold.  Runny nose, sore throat, general feeling of ooginess.  I'm going to bed early.

I'd like to leave you with the three levels of this photo.  The sign is from the coffee mess in my building.  The coffee mess a small closet, which somebody is responsible for opening and closing every day.  They've been closing it earlier and earlier.  This is irritating me.  I don't drink the coffee, but I do use the sink.  And they take the hot pot from across the hall and lock it up too.  I do use the hot pot.  Or at least, I would like to.

We do have a building cafeteria, but it isn't open past 3 or so.  If you want to make a hot drink or wash a bowl past whenever Mr. Coffee Closet has decided to close up the coffee mess, you're out of luck.

I find it ridiculous that in a building which houses hundreds of people, there isn't a kitchen.  Seriously?  This is such a tough thing to do?  In my old building, which was much smaller, there were TWO kitchens.  With functional sinks, and refrigerators, and microwaves, and coffee of one kind or another.  Somehow, we got along just fine.  However, in this building apparently we are not allowed to have hot drinks past two in the afternoon.

Oh yeah.  I am irked.

So in this photograph of the sign on the outside of the locked doors, I would like to note three things.  1) Nice with the passive aggressive, coffee guy.  2)  Nice with the grammar and spelling, coffee guy.  3)  Nice with the passive aggressive corrections, other guy.

Well, four things.  4)  You missed some stuff, other guy.

You would think I didn't like winter, if you read this

It is hard to believe that we evolved to live in a climate with multiple seasons.  It is such an adjustment to get used to big changes in the weather.  Every year, the cold comes on like a revelation.  A revelation that I will not be comfortable again for six months.

In the beginning it's kind of nice.  A little nip in the air.  A nice change from sweating to death.  No more chafing from heat.  No more mosquitoes!  (Lack of mosquitoes may be the one truly good thing about winter.)  The days grow shorter, and the leaves change.  Autumnal color changes are one of the most beautiful things on the planet.  It's free!  And it's going on all around you.  You don't even have to go out of your way to be struck by massive, sweet, visual glory.  It's a feast for the eyes.

At first, it's enjoyable to dig out the sweaters and turtlenecks, the long pants and the wool socks.  It feels like dress-up.  "Oh, there's that hat I love!"  Plus you can change your look with colored scarves, different styles of jackets, maybe some snazzy boots.  But it gets to be a little bit of a hassle, because when you go back indoors you have to take all the extra layers off and then what do you do with them?  Do you put them over the back of your chair?  Do you carry your coat over your arm?  Do you find a hook or an out of the way table and hope that no miscreant steals your warm layers?

Still, it's not so bad.  You get used to it.  There are coats piled and hung everywhere, and you have to remember where you left your warm boots, and why are there six left gloves but only four righties?  There's also the anticipation of the holidays.  Halloween!  Especially if you're immature like me.  Not just the costumes, either.  There's chocolate!  And after that there's Veteran's Day, which isn't exactly a jolly holiday but in between thanking service members we're allowed to take time off and do other things we want to do, like (oh, say) go backpacking.  Just when you've recovered from that, we get to have Thanksgiving with friends and neighbors and loved ones and some poor sad animal which got slaughtered so we could sit around and become more obese.  (... might have gotten off on a tangent there.)

There's even more of a nip in the air, and now it's more of a bite.  Less love nibble, more bitch slap.  But wait!  Christmas is coming!  Buying presents is so fun, and the cold weather reminds me that it's time to think of buying presents.  And lights!  And trees, and holiday music, and the smell of cut pine trees which got slaughtered so we could sit around and become more.. never mind.

Even though it's not Thanksgiving yet, I still kept an eye out for Christmas lights on my drive home tonight.  I *LOVE* Christmas lights.  Love 'em.

There weren't any, though.

Okay, so we've gotten through most of the holidays.  Oh, New Year's!  That one's good too.  Staying up late and drinking.  So basically reliving college?  Whatever, it's good fun.  But the day after that.. that's it.  You're done.  All the fun is over, but winter is still here.  Still stealing your lunch money and shoving you in a locker.  Winter is running your life for the foreseeable future.  Dealing with all the extra warm layers is a literal burden.  And those warm layers are getting wet and cold sometimes, and that is sheer misery.  Your feet get damp (because all your sweat glands migrated there after Halloween) and then your feet are cold the whole rest of the day.  Or you carry a spare pair of socks everywhere with you, and you look like a hobo with socks sticking out of your pockets.  But at least your feet are warm when you change your socks after lunch.  I bet your coworkers appreciate the view of your feet while you're swapping the woolies.

The first snow is cool.  Everything is white and pretty and new!  Even the first shoveling is a little fun.  It's like making sculpture on a grand scale.  It's not even hard!  Until you've been doing it for about an hour, and then you remember that you're old now, and your back kind of.. hates you, and wants you to die.  You retreat into the house to get warm, but bow to necessity and stick a freaking icepack on your lower back while simultaneously trying to warm the rest of yourself back up with a blanket or a warm sweater.

It goes on and on like that.  With every snowfall you get a little more bitter.  Will it never end, you think?  Is this the longest winter that has ever been?  (No.  Man up, wuss.)  You can't remember the last time you walked outside without your shoulders tightening involuntarily against the cold.  You can't remember stepping out of the shower and not getting goosebumps.  You stop being so careful coming into the house - snow is going to get everywhere anyway.  Maybe you just give the hell up on trying to exercise, and you settle in on the sofa with a beer.  (This sounds good, doesn't it?)  And then your lovehandles breathe a happy sigh and settle a little too, anticipating imminent company.

I tell you what, though.  If it weren't for the winter, spring would not make me nearly so happy.  Sometimes you have to suffer to really enjoy a reward.  The first day of the new year in which you can walk outside in your shirtsleeves?  That is a glorious day.

In which I get no credit for crunchy steps

It wasn't really cold today, but for some reason I felt it bone deep.  I think I needed more layers.  I got too cocky with my cold weather skills.  I didn't wear a liner shirt or long johns.  And I was cold all dang day.  I have my long fleece robe on over my clothes right now, and I'm drinking a mug of peppermint tea.  I think I'm starting to warm up.

Today I started the 10k step challenge.  I thought it would be no problem, but I didn't register 10k steps.  I'm closer to 7k.  I *should* have done 7k steps just on my daily walk today.  I suspect walking on the snow gave me not enough impact to really register the steps.  Which is a bummer.  And walking on crusty snow is harder than walking on soft snow!  I worked harder and will get less credit for it.  Ah, well.  In the end the important thing is the exercise, not the contest.

I asked my boss and my manager today if I could have a week off to hike into Trail Days and they were both fine with it.  I immediately lost all focus on work and went into planning mode.  How many miles should I plan for?  Any resupply opportunities?  If I drove myself down, where would I leave the car?  If JD drove me, where would I stay during Trail Days?  Where are my maps for that section?  So many questions.

Then I did the math and realized I would have just about three weeks of leave to spend on a hike later on this year.  Of course, that precludes sick time and a vacation with JD, so I may have to do some negotiating.  Or take leave without pay.  (Of course, leave without pay is dependent on the company okay.  )

That longer hike will be much more challenging in every way.  I plan to go southbound from Katahdin to Monson or Stratton.  It's much tougher terrain for an out of shape hiker.  Still, if there's one thing I'm good at, it's taking it slow and easy.  As long as I pace myself it should be all right.  Weather and health permitting, I hope to be quite active prior to the hike so I will be maybe less hammered by it than I would be otherwise.

We are supposed to have a wee ice storm tonight.  I hope it doesn't amount to much.  If I telecommute, there will be nothing preventing me from getting out my maps and guidebooks.  I don't know if I have that much willpower.

Give that key in my back a few twists, if you wouldn't mind

Three nights now with no sleep aids.  I keep waking up in the middle of the night.  Sleep aids are starting to look pretty good.

I feel a bit like a wind up toy that has run down.  I didn't even go for a walk today.  I wore an extra layer of clothing top and bottom today, and yet I was freezing in my office.  I wore my hat and scarf indoors, and fetched a blanket to cover my legs.  I was having the opposite of a hot flash.  Kind of missing the hot flashes, hope they come back soon.  At least until spring arrives.

The kittens are still thrilled to be allowed into the guest room.  They keep finding small objects to kick out onto the wood in the hallway for soccer playing.  What is it they do in soccer?  Scrimmage? The kittens are scrimmaging.  A LOT.  The chandelier downstairs keeps vibrating.

I found a recipe for garlic sauce (the kind that goes on broccoli at your local Chinese hole in the wall) a couple of days ago and forwarded it to JD.  He made a pretty fair chicken and broccoli in garlic sauce tonight.  Now we don't have to go to a restaurant to have it!  I haven't asked how annoying it was to make.  Not too bad, I hope.  Between that and the Costco Broccoli Bag of Doom, my veggie outlook is very positive right now.  :)

"and a kitten in a fir tree" (sing it with me now!)

I have listened to (and participated in) nonstop bitching about the recent cold weather. We are all spoiled, people!  It was a strangely warm fall and we all got used to it.  So while I totally empathize?  Get used to it!  This is how it is *supposed* to be.  December = cold.  Xmas = cold.[1] [2]

That said, I still didn't go for a walk today.  I need warmer pants.  I did take the stairs up and down from the server room a number of times, in penance.  My beloved is continuing to run in this weather and I admire him for it.  Though possibly you feel warmer when you run.  Maybe I'll try that.

I met up with Kobi for lunch, which was a hoot.  Except the part where I somehow left my wallet at work.  There I was, driving like a maniac on amphetamines, and no license in my pocket!  If you're going to get pulled over you should definitely be carrying a license.  I drove back to work very soberly, after Kobi paid for lunch.  (Argh.)  We are redoing lunch soon, so I can buy the meal in return.  And also for more talking, because most of my conversation consisted of "Om nom nom" and "OMG I can't believe I left my wallet."  So I'm pretty sure there are some more topics we need to cover.

My naturopath will be put off, but I got a flu shot this evening.  (With wallet!  You can do many things if you have a wallet, including having a nice lady stick you with a needle and jam nasty bugs into your arm.  The world is a weird and wonderful place.)  I will be spending time with five underaged family members soon, not to mention hordes of travelers.  Everybody knows that both of those categories are just crawling with disease.  My immune system needs all the help it can get.[3]

In the Daily Kitten Update, I am pleased to announce that all three kittens made it to the main floor today.  Everybody is interacting with everybody.  Andy has not yet gotten a kitten to chase him, but he has gotten very close.  Nazca finally quit whining about his brother and sister abandoning him and crept downstairs.[5]  Oliver and Dory tooks turns pouncing each other and trying to destroy the tree and the curtains. It was *just* how it should be.  I am happy.  You can't imagine how much I look forward to coming home to kittens right now.

Oh, and also?  When I got home tonight?  Cookies!  I smelled them baking right as I came through the front door.  We have lit up trees and kittens and cookies.  It's the *best*.


[1] Before you start complaining about my use of Xmas, please read hear on the historical basis of the word Xmas:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xmas

[2] Not that I haven't had shorts on during the holidays before.  That one year in the 70's it was so dang hot.  It just felt wrong.  Which leads me to believe I would have problems with the Southern hemisphere and holiday timing.

[3] Nonetheless, I'm sure I will be calling in bedridden immediately after the holidays.  With luck I'll make it to New Years first.  Maybe I'll have the flu on a weekend so I don't use any leave time.  I am making big hiking plans for my leave next year.[4]

[4].. but not as big as this year's. Sadly.

[5] He immediately ran back up, of course.

I remember what boredom is

I got bored today.  Can you imagine?  I had forgotten what it was like.

First I let everybody out to interact while I ate breakfast, and nobody exploded or hissed or had a conniption.  Then I drove to work and went to a boring meeting, then coiled cables, then tried to remember what my job is when I'm not being freaking insane.  I can't remember!  It will come back to me I'm certain.  I asked Marc what we do, and he said "Fix things when they break" but surely that can't be right.[3]

It was really too cold to walk, so no walkies for me.  And I don't say that lightly.  It was the sort of cold that makes you hunch until your spine forms a C.  The sort of cold that makes all your exposed surfaces hurt.  It in fact changes your definition of exposed surfaces to include "the areas under my jeans that aren't covered by socks" as well as "my scalp, which is not satisfactorily covered by my hair or my fleece hat."  The wind makes your eyes tear and your cheeks burn, despite the fleece hat and the heavier duty scarf (which superseded last weekend's woefully inadequate thin scarf.)

I did have several warm areas.  Most of my torso, in fact.  I'm still wearing the bulky down jacket I bought at Burlington Coat Factory over a decade ago.  It's seen a lot of wear.  The cuffs have worn through.  There are permanent stains on the front from carrying buckets up against my chest as I fed the horses in the winter.[1]  The zipper has no zipper pull and hence can't really be used.[4]  The velcro at the wrists became mostly ornamental years ago, so I can't keep the wind out.  But nevertheless it's the warmest coat I own, and I got it out of the closet for this weather.

It's not even that cold.  It was 25 when I left the house the morning.  But when that wind whips up to 35 mph or so, it feels like death is hunting you on an icicle.  It is very good weather for staying inside.  I feel bad for my horse.  I hope he's not suffering.[2]

And all the other horses too, of course.  I hope they're not suffering either.

I know you are wondering, so I will tell you:  the Great Kitten Integration of 2010 is going well.  Even Nazca has ventured most of the way down the stairs.  I let everybody out when I got home shortly before 7 tonight, and there has been a variety of nose sniffing and tail sniffing and thundering up and down stairs.  But no yowling or mean faces.  It seems that peace may be coming.  Not that I'm holding my breath.

And that has been my day.  Boredom, cold, and kittens.  Excuse me while I go lather myself in Bag Balm.  It will not solve boredom or cold (or kittens) but it might make the skin stop trying to leave my body.  Could somebody please tell my parts that the stress is over and we can go back to normal now?

[1] Molasses and oil stains do not come out.

[2] Not that I went to check on him or anything.

[3] At any rate, I had several moments when nobody was emailing or calling or knocking, and I actually sighed from boredom.  Also I checked Wikipedia for interesting articles.

[4] I have four snaps to use instead of, though formerly in addition to, the zipper.

Delicious barley beverage

I'm drinking a hot beverage.*  And why am I doing that?  Because it's 47 degrees out.  That might seem warm to you if you're in Minnesota, but it was nearly 80 here earlier this week and I have not adjusted.  All my surfaces are cold.  You can feel the cold through my clothes if you put a hand on me, as JD is wont to do.  Fortunately he usually has enough warm to go around. **

I look forward to the change of season, because it means I get to wear different clothes.  They're the same clothes I had last year, but different from what I wore last week.****  Fuzzy sweaters, warm socks, hats, scarves, gloves.. it's all novel for a little while.  By April I will be desperate to wear shorts.  And to do five loads of laundry instead of ten.  Winter clothing is so bulky.

This week has contained something new to me.  Headaches.  I get migraines, yes, but on a schedule.  I don't get, you know, HEADaches.  Like other people, I mean.  Only the left side of my head ever hurts.  But now I'm like regular people.*** I've been squinting at teeny weeny eye-strain-o-vision type while trying to make sure that three columns of similar numbers are all correct.  I've heard that this can give you a headache but I've never experienced it before.  Fortunately it's not bad.  More of an annoyance than anything else. 

With luck tomorrow will involve no numbers.  What it will involve is chili and candy.******  I'm making chili because JD and I disagree on what chili is.  He makes a very nice stew, but it's not chili.  So I must make it myself.  (And it's DELICIOUS.)  He had the nerve to suggest I put it in the ... what do you call those things that slow cook your food?  With a ceramic pot and a heating element?  One of those.  The thing is, chili is supposed to cook down.  Those ceramic thingies just don't do it for me.  There needs to be browning involved.  Preferably a layer of starch actually bonds to the bottom of the pot.  That's when you have good chili.*****  We have habaneros so it should be spicy.  I hope so.  Ideally the top of my head will tingle when I eat it.  Less ideally, I'll probably have a a burning ring of fire the day after.  I consider it a sacrifice to the gods of chili.

*Pero
**So much so that he goes to lengths to get cold before bed so he doesn't roast under the covers.  I'm not sure we're of the same species.
***In this instance only.
****The cat just introduced Christmas lights into the coat closet.  He has lit the Cat Cave.  I am still speculating as to whether or not this was on purpose.

Notice the strand of lights now tucked behind the closet door

Did he do it on purpose, or not?

 

 

*****As long as you're not the one cleaning the pot.
******Oh god, candy.  I hope we have a lot of trick or treaters on Sunday or I'm going to be wearing a bag of candy on my thighs in a week.

Shivery

I realize the equinox was weeks ago, but for me the first day of fall is today.  I'm wearing a turtleneck sweater.  It's the most reliable sign.